The Full Gospel

What to do when there's nothing to say...part 2

2011-12-21T14:07:00.000-08:00

Mambacho Volcano, Granada, Nicaragua

continued from part 1...

Some of you might have wondered why I listed the verse fromPsalms 38:11. It sounds so sad and not encouraging right? One of the unforeseenaspects of battling cancer was the varying reaction from friends, family, and random people.

After dropping the "bomb" of our news on people itseemed that it either pushed people away or drew them closer to us. Some ofLisa's good friends basically ghosted after hearing the news and passing alongtheir condolences and obligatory offers to help. Then there were the people whowere more of acquaintances and they seemed to jump in with both feet in beingthere for her in many different ways. I don't have a big opinion about thisbecause it's tricky to really know what goes through peoples minds some times.Maybe people find it depressing to be around sick people when they don't havethe "answers." Believe me, you get plenty of funny stares when you'reout in public with your bald wife as if they have never seen a cancer patient!(that awkward thing again!) Maybe they are just too busy.

The crazy thing aboutsomething like cancer is when you are going through the treatment it takes overyour whole life and schedule; whereas your friends etc have to continue on withnormal life. It kind of makes you feel like you are stuck in some type oftime-space vacuum..wait a sec, I don't even know what that is, never mind.Again, don't misunderstand what I am getting at. No one expects you to stopyour life, which has it's own challenges for sure, to worry about us.

This whole phenomenon we experienced caused disappointment,and yet also brought great joy. What I mean is, sometimes it blows you awaywhen someone you wouldn't expect shows up in a big way or a little way even.

A couple examples:

1-One month into Lisa's treatment in 2005 I broke my leg atwork (I was a police officer back then) and had to have a metal rod surgicallyinserted into my bone. I wasn't able to walk unassisted for almost 4 months.One of my co-workers, who was my friend but never really did anything out sideof work, showed up one day unannounced and mowed our lawn. He just did it andleft and continued to do so through the end of the season.

2-One women from our church insisted on helping with drivingLisa to treatments, as I had to go to physical rehab and had to work still.This same women would call spontaneously and offer to take Lisa to Starbucks orsomething to get her out of the house when able.

So, back to the title of these two post; what to do whenthere's nothing to say. On the very practical side, here are the things thatwere most helpful:

1-grocery gift cards--these were great because Lisa couldonly eat certain foods and it was much easier to buy those and cook forourselves rather than having meals cooked for us. They were a huge financialhelp as Lisa was no longer able to work and we were hurting cash flow wise

2-Restaurant cards--also a great financial help and wereally like the restaurants that had the curb side pick up type thing. OftenLisa could not eat out due to her suppressed immune system but we enjoyed beingable to bring in comfort food!

3-help with appointments--Lisa didn't like to drive a lotbecause she had experienced fainting spells many times.

But, moving on and finally getting back to yellow dog! Themost meaningful thing that anyone ever did for us was just show up. Because Lisaoften was not healthy enough or did not have the energy, she was cooped up inour home. Cabin fever would have been a gross understatement at times! Therewere several people who would regularly show up and just sit and visit.

I felt the same way. It was really nice when people wouldcall up (when I was laid up with broken leg etc) and say they were bringing melunch and came over and just chatted it up for a while.

Yellow dog reminded me of those special people who justshowed up. The people who didn't know what to say but knew somehow what to do.They just quietly walked along our side and somehow made it a little easier.Many of them we never expected and many of them we never had the opportunity toask why or to thank them.

My challenge to you is to watch for those people, whetherclose friends or not, that could use a yellow dog. Press through the awkwardness you feel...

But, what do I know?

epilogue--Please note that in our current situation we arepositioned well and have few bills to cover, much unlike our previous go in2005. I only say this because this post was not an "ask" forfinancial help or gift cards! but, if you feel led...ahahaha!

What to do when there's nothing to say...part 1

2011-12-20T10:52:00.000-08:00

"A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity." --book of Proverbs 17:17

"My friends and companions avoid me because of my wounds; my neighbors stay far away." --Book of Psalms 38:11

So back in August, Lisa and I were in Language school in Granada, Nicaragua. We often walked to the central park area after morning class for a little lunch. One day we noticed a yellow street dog (pictured here) that decided to follow us the entire 15 min walk back to our apartment. Lisa loved it! You see, Lisa has a soul-tie with our dog Avery back home and I think feeling like this scruffy street dog was her friend was cool for her. It was entertaining for sure. The next day we were walking near the same area and saw yellow dog going the opposite direction on the opposite side of the street. While trotting along he looked over and saw us walking and he immediately crossed the street through the frantic traffic and picked up his place behind us and trotted along. As you can see by Lisa's grin, it was another perfect dog moment for her (I think Lisa secretly wanted to start an entire ministry to street dogs..but I digress). We never did figure out why he liked us; we never fed him or even petted him...kindred spirits I guess.

Any time you face a major trial in life, a life-storm we like to call it, you find that it's your relationships that allow you to survive it. First is your relationship with our God, then your friends and family. When Lisa was sick with cancer in 2005 we had some unexpected experiences both in close relationships and in those random acquaintances. What follows are a few thoughts reflecting back...

Because I like bullet list these days, here we go...

1) No one likes Awkward--I think a top five awkward moment is when you have not seen someone in a while and they drop a bomb on you. I remember several times when Lisa had cancer in 2005 that I would run into some one and they would ask how I was doing and I would say, "well, my wife just had a miscarriage and we now found out she has an aggressive form of cancer." Insert lonnnng awkward pause....I felt like dang, maybe I shouldn't have told them because it's obvious they feel so awkward now because they don't know what to say. Then I would feel awkward because maybe I should have known not to drop a bomb on that person? And around and around we go on the awkward wheel!

2)I know you meant well, but....--Here comes a giant preface: please do not misunderstand anything I might say here; I'm trying to help! The big preface is because I want to touch on what people often say to those in life-storms and how those words might be perceived by the listener. When we learn of tragedy or suffering or sickness or loss, we soooo want to make it better. Humans, and I have found middle-class Americans especially, do not like pain. We do everything we can to avoid it, so when we learn of bad news or someone drops a "bomb" on us, we quickly want to make it better. Partly of course because we truly care, but I think also because we cannot stand the awkward monster and want him out of the room as soon as possible.

Back when Lisa was diagnosed in 2005 we also learned in the same conversation that her treatments would make her sterile and that we would not be able to have children. That's a lot to swallow all at once. After sharing this news with one person they said, (referencing child bearing) "Well, God can do a miracle if he wants." Nice theological statement that's hard to argue with, but c'mon. Was that supposed to make me feel better in that moment? Another person on the same subject said, "Well, you can always adopt." Again, from my fox hole is that any consolation for our present loss? I know these people meant well, for sure, but in some sense I think their words, if honestly disambiguated, had a lot to do with making things better and alleviating awkwardness. We are so wired to have answers and solutions it seems and never want to marinate in the pain.

Recently I ran into one person and shared that Lisa was diagnosed with cancer again and they said lackadaisically, "I know she's gonna be fine" and meandered away. Really? How do you know she's gonna be fine?

I think the best response we have heard though came from Lisa's oncologist who treated her in 2005 while trying to express his thoughts around Lisa having cancer again. He said, "Excuse the french, but WHAT THE F?" I am not saying we should all start dropping F-bombs, though I would laugh if you did, but I so appreciated a down-to-earth response that had no textbook condolences and made us feel so NOT awkward but made us feel like someone was sympathizing with our situation.

Some times when there's nothing to say, there's nothing to say. Quote me on that. It's been interesting how our experiences have allowed me to be an encouragement to others facing similar situations when I have used what I have learned. A friend of mine's wife was recently diagnosed with cancer also and I said to him, "Man, I hate cancer, that just sucks!" It really opened up a great conversation where I think he felt safe to share his concerns and frustrations and there was no need to expect awkwardness.

As I wrap up part 1, let's be a little raw for a minute. What to say is sometimes a bigger challenge for Christians. I think it's because we feel we need to have a cleverly faithful saying or we are worried that someone's faith is crumbling if they confess frustration or confusion about their circumstances.

To me, the key to these two is relationship and timing. Make sure you have the relationship credits built up before you decide someone needs a word of "truth" from God's word. A great example was my acquaintance that said "God can do a miracle" I mentioned early referencing child birth. Coming from a close friend or my parents; I would nod a say that's true. Coming from a random person my reaction is, "how can he say a thing like that to me, he doesn't know what I am feeling right now." Timing goes along the same lines. Save the truths and inspiring thoughts for the right time and setting. Passing in the hallway or bumping into someone in the mall may not be perfect time to share that special bible verse. Intentionally meeting up with that person later and sharing a Starbucks probably is better.

But, what do I know?

>>tune in tomorrow to learn how Lisa and yellow dog play into all of this in part 2

But, what do I know?

2011-12-13T07:01:00.000-08:00

Some might have wondered why I say, "But, what do I know?" at the end of my writings. For one I just like the way it passive-aggressively rolls off my tongue after I make some kind of bold opinionated passionate statement. Secondly, it allows you the reader an easy out to dismiss whatever you don't believe or agree with. It's my way of being a really opinionated deep thinker and yet at the same time polite about it. I also have another saying that I normally only use in closer circles where people know me a little more intimately and are used to my overly grandiose prefaces and maniacal conjectures. So, after that 4 sentence preface, my other saying is "Here's what I know...". I use this one when I need to drop bombs or tell it like it is or when I have run out of politeness....

So, here's what I know....

1) My wife has cancer...again. See her blog for details.

2) Cancer sucks no matter what type it is or who has it.

3) The concept of "fairness" is a tool of the devil, so don't be a tool.

Maybe we should park on this one a minute. When we are children our parents and teachers spend a lot of energy trying to teach us to be fair. To share with others. To play nice. Great morals to live by I think, but there is a disastrous side affect in my opinion. We are told every day as children that things must be fair and equal, but when we try to apply this norm to our teenage and adult lives we are told, "well, life isn't fair." We all know this to be true, but under the surface we hold to the idea of fairness and that when fairness is not achieved then we feel robbed and abused in that situation.

Why this is important in this list is that when "bad" things happen to "good" people we say to ourselves, "that's not FAIR." Which leads to bitterness, confusion, and for some a break in faith. It becomes increasingly problematic when we act like a tool towards God. We take this concept of fairness and question God about the suffering of "good" people. I won't belabor this here, though I should, but here is a quick and dirty rebuttal to our normal concepts in this line of thinking.

1-"Good" people is a misnomer. To play with this, you first need to establish your theology. Because of Adam and Eve in Genesis 3, we are all born bad. Meaning we are all born with a sinful human nature that without divine intervention we can never be at one with God in eternity. We cannot be "good" enough on our own. We cannot earn salvation. It only comes through Jesus; God's sacrifice for our sinful natures. It only comes through grace and mercy (see Ephesians 2:8). So when using the term good people we need to see it from the divine perspective.

2-God is not FAIR. He is JUST. Stew on that for a minute. Huge difference. The bible has so many explanations about human suffering, but many of them are hard to reconcile to our earthly world views. They have to be seen through the lenses of faith and eternal perspective. Referencing back to point #1, do we really want fairness from God? That would mean we all get what we deserve, and let's be honest, many of us are pretty good people but I'm pretty sure if all were told most of us would not want what we deserve in our quest for fairness.

God being Just has everything to do with the fact that He is the creator of all things and ultimately will make all things new in the end. That is when our salvation will count the most because at that time, because he is Just and not fair, he will allow the sacrifice of Jesus' life to cover over what we "deserve".

Another aspect of this, and maybe harder to grasp hold of, is the sovereignty of God. Back to your theology, by the mere fact that he is God, we cannot possibly fully understand him or his ways within our human existence (see Isaiah 55:8). nor should we expect him to justify himself or his ways to us (see Job 38). If the creator is required to justify or prove itself worthy to the created thing, is the creator really God? Marinate on that one!

Moving on...

4) Being a Caregiver is part of the suffering too. When you have a family member or close friend who needs caring for and you commit to the process, you have entered into their suffering too. Back in 2005 my wife endured 42 weeks of Chemotherapy, 5 weeks of radiation, 1 crazy 9 hour surgery, countless hospital emergency room visits, and several 7-10 day hospitalizations with infections. Where do you think I was during all of that, on vacation at the beach? I was right by her side in every moment. (One positive outcome is that I am an expert at navigating hospitals and sleeping in chairs). As the caregiver you also have the subliminal role as the emotional fortress. No time for melt downs or negativity; your patient needs you to be the booster and cheering section!

I point this out here, because when we went through "chemo" class in 2005 the health counselor pointed out that the divorce rate among spouses with terminal or chronic illness is 75%. Say what? Dirty rotten scoundrels we say, but the fact is that suffering will either make you or break you and your relationships.

So, don't forget the Caregivers! We all know people who are Caregivers. I have several friends who are dealing with not only things like cancer, but also couples who have children with special needs that makes them life long Caregivers.(!)

I'll end here for now. Thanks for bearing with what I know...or don't know if you prefer.

Snapshots of Light

2011-11-07T08:30:00.000-08:00

"I rise before dawn and cry for help; I have put my hope in your word" --Psalms 119:147

"In him was life, and that life was the light of men" --John 1:4

"But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light." -- 1 Peter 2:9

The bible uses a lot of light language doesn't it? Actually a lot of it is pretty heavy, but that wasn't the kind of light I was talking about....

I love photos more than video I think. I think snapshots make you stop and reflect and try to absorb that specific moment that the shutter opened and closed on in the blink of an eye. Being here over three months now full-time, I have seen many a "snapshot" into people lives. When you are here day in and day out, you begin to string snapshots together to see life as it really is. You don't have the luxury of just keeping the nice ones either. Here's a few strings of snapshots: (names have been changed)

Bob- He loves God and serves him daily in ministry. He has the heart to start a whole new outreach into the most impoverished community around Puerto Cabezas. He wants to feed hungry children. He wants to work with street kids within their emotional and spiritual needs as well as the physical. He is over-the-hill now, but is looking to get married. He's a traditional guy so he will not get married until he has built his wife to-be a proper home. So, he's building board by board, nail by nail, as he gets the money. Not too long ago, things took a turn for Bob. He had a sudden gall bladder attack and ended up in the under-resourced local hospital where he lay in bed for over a month. He lost over 30 lbs becoming just a shadow of his previously stocky presence. If fact, he became so weak that he could not have the surgery that he desperately needed. When he finally regained his strength a couple months later, the hospital did not have his blood type and the surgery was delayed once again. He did finally have the surgery (the old style slash you open type), and was actually back on his feet working within days despite the pain. But, within a day or two he slowed back down due to an infection in the wound since the hospital had not placed a proper drain tube considering the non-sterile conditions of the hospital..

Abraham--He is a simple fisherman from the islands off the coast of Nicaragua. He has an entertaining creole accent that not even the best of actors from Hollywoodville could imitate. He's always positive and always put's it plain to ya. The other day he was telling me about a fishing trip at sea in an 18ft outboard motor boat to pull lobsters in which the engine broke and they drifted at sea for 15 days without food or water. I said that seemed way to dangerous and not worth it, to which he said with his jovial accent, "well ya see, don't wark, me kids don't eat, and me kids gots ta eat." Well, his wife finally convinced him to move inland where he started driving a taxi. Barely making it on that his taxi finally gave out and there were no savings to get it back on the road. Two weeks after the break down things were getting desperate. "No wark, na food." Abraham was able to secure a micro-loan of $430 to make all the necessary repairs and get back on the road as a "warking mawn". But, like Bob, it's just not that easy here. The day before he was to start working again with his taxi, he fell off the roof of his neighbor's house trying to fix a light for the widow who lives there. Abe badly sprained his wrist and his left ankle (clutch foot when driving) as a result of the fall....did Abe have money for proper medical attention...no way. With a little help Abe was able to get an xray; nothing is broken, but sprains are slow to heal. Abe said the other day, "but this ain't holdin me up none, gots to wark." "don't wark, don't have what ta eat."

Nacho-- On the lighter side (pun intended), he is a young man who loves life and has real dreams for his future. He taught himself english by reading books in the library and especially the english/spanish bible. He even taught himself the capitols of every country in the world and all 50 U.S. states...not lying here, I've tested him! He loves baseball and is a phenomenal athlete. I caught a snapshot of him playing the other day and saw something remarkable. You see, he is left handed, but being that nothing is easy here there are no left handed gloves available. So, yesterday he was playing center field and someone blasted a hit deep into center field. A runner was already on second and there was great pressure to make a stop on this play. He ran to get under the ball and easily caught it..with his left hand..then quickly took the glove off and grabbed the ball with his left hand and hurled it to 3rd base, just in time to make the out! He made it look so natural as if baseball was supposed to played that way. But, his team ended up losing nonetheless.

Sunrises, lights, and snapshots. It can seem all kinds of depressing to learn of the "lucha" (struggle) to see transformation in their lives. But, when I read verses like in Psalms, John, and 1 Peter, I remember that God doesn't just see snapshots. He sees every moment good or bad and wants to bring light into them all. The real hope for us is in this. As Psalms decrees, it all begins by us starting, even before the sun rises, to seek the one who brings hope and light.

But, what do I know?

Gettin' Dirty

2011-08-25T15:56:00.001-07:00

Pictured here are photos from the community of Betania. This community is one of our focus areas as part of the PEACE plan with Pastor Earl Bowie and the Verbo Church in Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua.

Austin Fricker landed in Nicaragua about a month ago and is leading our agricultural initiatives in this community. (Read Background Story Here). Austin is the definition of a hard worker; learned from his Papa I suppose (pretty sure since I met his dad last year!).

Anyways, things are rolling in Betania. Due to the 4 year relationship we have had with this community, they have donated over 15acres of land for us to use to do demonstration farming. Our goal is to use Austin's expertise to introduce more productive methods of farming to this community. In their current plight, they barely produce enough to survive on let alone create any "savings" to purchase other things they need.

Pastor Earl has identified several families in that community that will partner with us and work the fields under Austin's direction. Austin has some great ideas and has done extensive research over the past year preparing for this endeavor. He hopes to introduce high quality seed as well techniques to naturally enrich the soil. He also has plans to introduce a green house into the mix. We are also looking at planting cash crops such as Jamaican flower trees.

Within just a few weeks the workers have cleared most of the land (all this by HAND mind you) and are currently putting up a good barbwire fence around the field to keep animals out like wandering cows, pigs, and horses.

It's a lofty goal to put on such a demonstration and to hope for such transformational results...but, that's how Austin rolls.

His goal is to have things ready for the September planting cycle...I have no doubts they will be ready!

But, what do I know?

Ponderous Carwash

2011-08-08T14:56:00.000-07:00

"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward." --book of Colossians 3:23-24

A clean car is a happy car. I've always believed that cars have personalities, maybe even souls...well maybe not souls, but you get the point.

After 2 weeks in the middle east doing other craziness I am back in Nicaragua working and going to language school. While driving back from lunch today with friends I reached my limit for how dirty my truck was. So, I went on a mission to get a sweet car wash for my truck. I call it a mission because nothing in Nicaragua is necessarily easy and most of the time interesting things will happen while on your mission. For example, while returning back into Granada from a mission to Managua yesterday I almost got T-boned by a drunk cowboy on his horse. That's interesting right?

A short drive from our apartment I found Auto-Lavado Perez. For $2.50 USD three guys attacked my car with gusto cleaning every nook and cranny outside and inside by hand. I enjoyed watching my faithful truck being liberated from it's prison of filth.

More so however, what I was observing was indicative of the reason for my hope in this place. It was no small decision to commit 12 months in Nicaragua in an effort to advance CFC's shared vision with the VERBO church and to consult with ORPHANetwork on business development. What I saw in them was a nice reminder of the potential here. The three guys attacking my car took such pride not only in the quality of their work, but they took great satisfaction even in the style as to which they worked. The way they confidently sloshed water from a bucket in the exact area they wished to splash, without hitting another worker or a car that is already dried nearby. Honestly it almost appeared as a choreographed dance of sorts; including of course the reggatone music pumping from the stereo.

All of that action for $2.50. With that type of work ethic and healthy pride, added to it small capital investments and coaching, combined with Kingdom of God principles and transformed lives....that has to have the potential to see "the Kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven." Maybe tomorrow I'll tell you about my spanish teacher tomorrow.

But, What do I know?

In Your Face

2011-06-11T10:14:00.000-07:00

I love trying to be super-cool camera guy. I don't really have any idea what I am doing, but I did spend a lot on a camera and that's half of it right?

What I have come to deeply enjoy about trying to be super-cool camera guy is that in my attempts to take good photos I find myself actually getting closer to situations than I normally would. I'll try to clarify. When looking at inspiring or unique photos in magazines or on the net, have you ever thought about what the photographer had to do to get that shot?

I have. And what I have discovered is that when trying to capture a meaningful moment you often have to get in close and actually interact with the people so that they are responding to you and not just the camera.

So, in this photo here I was in Nueva Vida, Nicaragua which is a refugee city of over 20,000 people that was built when victims were displaced by Hurricane Mitch in 1998. It's an impoverished place to say the least still today. This is Javier on the swing and one of his little friends. They are on the grounds of the Verbo Church in that community. Javier is one of the over 150 children who come to Verbo each day to the feeding center to receive a nutritious lunch. The food is provided to Verbo through partnerships with ORPHANetwork and Stop Hunger Now. In total, 1000 kids are fed lunch every day through these partnerships.

But back to Javier. I was trying to catch a great shot of Javier swinging and I realized that I needed to get close. What I didn't realize is that as I was futzing with my camera cluelessly making adjustments, Javier was swinging higher and higher! Just nano seconds after this photo was snapped I had to flip my head back to avoid a direct impact...much to his delight!

We had a good laugh of course after the dust settled. Javier jumped off the swing and gave me high-five as if we had accomplished some great feat together. Maybe Javier is a photographer at heart and wanted to help make the shot? Either way, being at the feeding center and helping to serve lunch, seeing the cooks in the steamy kitchen, watching the kids' smiles and laughter as they ate good food, and then looking down the street to gaze upon the shacks and meager houses they would return to after lunch...all these things brought me to yet another grandiose moment.

It's not trying to be super-cool camera guy that I love. I love being in situations that put the world's needs and what God is trying to do through us to so serve those needs in my face. When I hide behind the lens of my cushy life in the U.S. I can quickly forget things like hungry children and I don't want to forget. It's been a fast trip, only three days, but once again God used it to get in my face a little bit to remember what it's all about at the end of the day.

But, what do I know?

Organized Chaos

2011-03-15T12:11:00.000-07:00

Way back when I was in college one of the books I read for English 101 dealt with chaos theory and the butterfly affect. I really enjoyed melting my brain with cognitive forays that to many people served no real purpose but to confuse us.

Well, those people never tried purchasing baled used clothing from a non-profit in Virginia, who collected the clothes from other thrift stores as well as collecting from a church congregation, who then sorts them and bales them with some huge machine, then ships them via truck to Norfolk, at which it is fumigated then delivered to a shipping port, from where it's loaded onto a ship headed for the Bahamas, at where it changes ships and goes through the Panama canal, on which the other side it changes ships again and heads towards the west coast of Nicaragua...

(pause...stretch fingers...sip of Coke Light a friend bought me...continue typing...)

Upon arriving in Nicaragua it gets haggled in customs, thieves steal a few items, our weight is different than our invoice and we incur extra tax payments, from there is goes to Managua the capital, at which all 40,000 lbs of clothes are unloaded onto another truck that takes it across the country on 365 miles of dirt/mud roads, which takes 4 entire days, then upon arriving at 7am in Puerto Cabezas 6 men proceed to unload all of the bales and sort them, then which we reload the already purchased ones and deliver them to our buyer, at which we reload 84 bales she does not want from her previous shipment in OCT 2010.

And by the end of the day we had made a nice profit for PEACE Corporation which is the engine for our vehicle of transformation in Nicaragua. It has been on, and over, the edge of chaos throughout and what I learned in college has actually helped. It taught me that some chaos is actually good and keeps us sharp and pressing forward.

So, this morning I'm feeling pretty sharp, and am definitely pressing forward (by God's grace of course)....

But, what do I know?

Baptizing & Selling Clothes...for the Kingdom of God!

2011-03-12T18:21:00.000-08:00

"Look, the lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!" --book of John 1:29

John the Baptist belted out these words as he saw Jesus approaching where he was in Bethany near the Jordan river. Shortly after John baptized Jesus. Baptism is our public proclamation of our commitment to follow Jesus and is also symbolic of the cleansing of our sins through the death, burial, and resurrection of the only sinless man to ever walk this broken earth.

This afternoon I found myself standing on this sandy beach on the Caribbean Sea in Nicaragua. Pastor Earl Bowie, of our partner church in Puerto Cabezas, was baptizing 5 people who just recently started attending his church. There's always something special about watching people demonstrate their love for Christ publicly.

I think God does have a sense humor I mused during this event. Right as Pastor Earl was dunking one of the men a huge wave hit them and both Earl and the guy went under and resurfaced about 15 feet later. Maybe the guy had a lot of sin to wash away....okay settle down; that's a joke, not a theological statement.

The main purpose of my trip down this time however is to keep pressing on with our for-profit business (PEACE Corporation) that we have developed with the purpose to allow the ministry here to become self-sustaining. We just recently shipped another 40,000lbs of used clothes that we will be selling to various marketers. The business is already earning a small profit, but it's very early in the game and we are still building capacity. While here I will be exploring some diversification strategies for PEACE Corporation which include food sales in the airport and well drilling.

In case you were wondering, the profits from all activities of PEACE Corporation are used for community development, micro-enterprise creation, health care, and education in under resourced communities. In other words, it's a for-profit charitable corporation and the 5 owners receive no compensation.

So, tomorrow I will be looking to sell as many bales of clothes as possible to our biggest retail client. Let's pray she likes what she sees!

But, what do I know? (about selling clothes or doing business in Nica)

Stop Telling Me What I Can't Do!

2011-03-09T18:57:00.000-08:00

I've come to realize that our journey in attempting to understand the God who created everything that we see is quite a journey. In fact it's probably arrogant to say that "I understand God." Therefore I will not pretend to fully understand God. But I, like anyone else, can speak authentically from my own personal experiences.

Many people do not know the full story of how I left my career in police work (10yrs worth) and transitioned into full time work at the church as the Outreach Director, and that is not really the point here. But what is the point, my wife Lisa and I had felt the same calling and desire to be on mission for God full time in an international context.

Well, because we had built our lives previously on the standard American Dream of living the quiet life in the suburbs in a house with a white-picket fence and 2.8 children, we found ourselves in a financial prison that prohibited us from following God's calling on our lives. You know, buy the most expensive house you can afford because in the future your family will grow and so will your income....So we thought anyways....

So, for the past 3 years or so we had been telling everyone that we both would be full time on mission except that because of our huge mortgage payment Lisa had to earn a certain salary, and that because of the housing market there was no way that we could sell our house.

Buuuutttttt, then I went to Israel this past September. While standing on the northern side of the Sea of Galilee (the very spot pictured here) the group that I was with entered into a time of reflection and prayer. During that time I basically began to complain to God. "Why would you call us both to full time ministry and yet have us stuck with this mortgage payment?" "Why would you call us to sell our house when you know that the housing market is horrible and there's probably no way we could sell our house for the price that we need?"

Just like in the movie "The Matrix", at this point you might want to press pause and decide whether you want to know the truth or not.....

God answered my complaints directly. One thing I have realized in recent times is that God speaks to us exactly the way we need to hear him and essentially in the way that we speak to him. In a clear thought, here is what God said to me 3 times, "Stop telling me what I can't do!" Lisa and I in our complaints were really telling God what he could not do. He was asking us to be free from our giant mortgage payment, but fear and logic told us that it was not possible.

So, what can you do when God speaks? We put our house on the market when most people advised that we would not see any action and probably could not get the price we needed. Well, yesterday we got an offer and today ratified the contract. House sold!

Of course, there is so much more to say about the journey and maybe this is not the place. I would love to tell you about it. Email me at dholliday@cfellowshipc.org if you want to know more....

But, what do I know?

Superman, Jesus, & Super-friends

2011-03-03T06:09:00.000-08:00

"they have such a capacity for good, but only lack the light to show them the way"

--father of Superman

"I am the way and the truth and the life."

--Jesus

I was watching the original Superman movie the other night and realized how much HD had changed my life. Wow, those movies look old and like they were made with one of those old cameras where you stick your head under the cape and a powder flash ignites! My iphone takes better video than that!

The quote above is from the opening series of scenes in which young Superman (superboy?) goes to the north pole and spends a whole bunch of time learning from recordings of his father (played by the Godfather..lol) in his ice palace. Powerful insight from a supposedly secular movie right? So I guess Superman was suppose to show us the way to do good.

Insert major problem: I don't have a cape. I can't fly. I don't have laser beams that shoot out of my eyes (but I can shoot dirty looks pretty well). I don't have a groovy hair-do.

But, I do have Jesus. He said he was the way. So as I wish I had a cape, it's probably better to have a savior. When we follow Jesus' way he allows us to be super-friends to the world rather than super heroes. I don't think the world is looking for super heroes anyways because they just remind of us what we can't do.

Press Pause on super-friends.

This morning I was taking a measure of the condition of several friends that I have. One is going through a nasty divorce. It is so impacting my friend that he literally looks like he is physically dying when I look at him. Another friend's brother-in-law was diagnosed with cancer and died a mere 2 months later. Another friend struggles to understand their identity in this world and who God really is. Another friend has accomplished every goal he has set for himself career/financially and yet is crushed by the notion that it ultimately gave him no satisfaction.

A friend would reach out to these people as long as it was not too inconvenient. A friend would have really thoughtful advice. A friend would know some really great bible verses that speak directly to their situation. A friend would listen to their struggles as long as they don't start repeating themselves. A friend would help as long as they listen to their great advice.

Press play on super-friends. A super-friend doesn't know the word inconvenient. A super-friend listens more than they talk. A super-friend confesses their own struggles. A super-friend loves re-runs and thinks your stories get better every time you tell them. A super-friend knows Jesus' way. Jesus said to forgive 7 times 70. Jesus wept when people were sad. Jesus sat beside people that no one else would care to know or listen to. Jesus said that if your friend asks you for your shirt, give him your jacket also. Jesus died for his friends and all of us. He had to make a way for his friends and us to inherit eternal life with God.

Check me on this, just read Matthew, Mark, Luke, or John in the bible.

But, what do I know?

What are your assets?

2011-02-22T11:23:00.000-08:00

"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." -Thomas Jefferson

"Do you want to know who you are? Don't ask. Act! Action will delineate and define you." -Thomas Jefferson

"Seek justice, encourage the oppressed, defend the cause of the fatherless, plead the case of the widow" -Book of Isaiah 1:17

"Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says." -Book of James 1:22

Over the president's day weekend I thought it clever to visit Monticello, the home of one of our famous presidents, Thomas Jefferson. The tour of his home is quite intriguing as I was more fully able to appreciate the scientist/engineer that he was. His home is full of forward thinking ingenious designs. Such items included geared doors that would open both doors just by pulling on one, dumb waiters built into the sides of a fireplace mantel that went down into his wine cellar, and an octagonal shaped bedroom that had no dark corners because of it's shape.

Without boring you with the rest of the tour (go pay your own $17 to take the tour!), the profound tidbit that I learned was that Jefferson died with over $2 million dollars in debt (in today's dollars). Part of it was due to a terrible economic down turn, but mainly it was because he was just bad with money and often generous with securing loans for others. Shortly after his death the family held an estate sale to try and recover as best as possible. Though he owned a 5000 acre plantation, 90% of his wealth at the estate sale was in human beings. Jefferson's slaves and servants comprised 90% of his financial assets at the time of his death.

Curious that Jesus told us not to store up treasures on this earth (Matthew 6:19-21) because where our treasure is, there our heart will be also. I'm not sure whether Jefferson treasured his human capital at all, and this is not a diatribe on slavery anyways, but people are what really matter. They are the greatest capital there is. Both Jefferson and the bible agree that one of our greatest values to the world is what we do for others.

Will my conscience allow me to stand by while every injustice imaginable happens everyday? Will I just listen to the bible and not do what it says? Or will I act, and seek to define myself as a follower of Christ willing to give all to end tyranny, seek justice, free the oppressed, defend the fatherless.....

But, what do I know?

Debo...will she be an Outlier?

2011-02-08T21:00:00.000-08:00

"It is not the brightest who succeed. Nor is success simply the sum of the decisions and efforts we make on our own behalf. Outliers are those who have been given opportunities-and who have had the strength and presence of mind to seize them" - Malcolm Gladwell

Well said Malcolm. Often we look at successful people and we too easily attribute their success to luck or some privileged opportunity. But as Mr. Gladwell deciphers it's much more complicated than that and he proves it through multiple accounts in his book "Outliers".

But, Mr. Gladwell, what about those people who live in a system or context that our frame of reference is not really relevant nor practical for disambiguating the nature or process for "success"?

Pictured here is my friend Deborah. She is a Miskito women, mother of four, who lives in the jungles of Nicaragua on the Coco River. Her community is only accessible by river and has no modern conveniencess such as electricity or clean water. But, Deborah is an Outlier in the making nonetheless. Debo cannot read or write, but because of her unique intelligence...being fluent in her native language and in Spanish...she has been offered a job as a teacher in a community school. Having a job that actually pays money in her community is a phenomenal opportunity and would put her on a trajectory unlike most in her community. It would set her on a path that is different than her mother and the generations before her.

What's the catch? What is preventing her from taking the path of the Outlier of her community? She is illiterate. Debo is so impressive that the school looking to hire her did not even realize that she was illiterate.

Here is the part that Mr. Gladwell couldn't predict. As a church that is focused on holistic ministry and believes in this idea of the Kingdom of God, we actually care about literacy. We care about it to the extent that we have spent thousands of dollars and man-hours to adapt a robust curriculum to the Nicaraguan/Miskito culture....for Debo. She is the quintessential target. Literacy will literally change her life.

Pray for Debo. Pray for Literacy. Pray for the Kingdom of God that it will collide with her world and her community's in such a way that will glorify God and draw more people to the truth of Jesus' good news.

But, what do I know?

60% Latwan

2011-02-03T14:35:00.000-08:00

Not too long ago I wrote a post about what makes us cry in 2011. Within my crazy orbit I once again was transported to the jungles of Nicaragua in early January. Believe it or not while in the jungle I was thinking on what I would say on Jan 30th when speaking at CFC in both services.

The message, as you now know, was to attempt to communicate the concept of a church that is both Attractional and Missional. (here to watch the message).

In the closing of my rant I exposed the quandary of whether we really care or not...about the 60% who will never want to come to our church, but yet need to hear the good news in a way that makes sense to them.

Briefly back to Nicaragua. In the Miskito Indian language the word for love is Latwan. The word for pain is also Latwan. Sounds intrinsically romantic doesn't it; to those who have experienced both. The interesting thing about emotions is that not only did God create them, but he also experiences them. We love to quote the verse where Jesus wept because his friend Lazarus had died (John 11). That's easy to understand in the sense that Jesus, though he was God, was also in that moment fully human. But let me take you back to Genesis 6:6 where it says that God grieved over how wicked his creation (man) had become. Throughout the bible we can read where God was "angry" or "angered" also.

As Pastor Will Cravens would say, "so what's the point?"

If CFC is actually going to engage the missional side of our calling, in our local context, we must embrace and experience Latwan. Why, because God experiences it! We must love people so much that it hurts. We must Latwan (love) people so much that it causes Latwan (pain) to know that people are living and dying without having heard the good news of Jesus' gospel.

So, as I said in my talk on Sunday, what are we willing to do because of Latwan? Will we do the hard work of learning how to tell the good news to the people who will never, for so many reasons, be willing to sit in our box at CFC? The hard work being to figure out how to speak across the cultural lines from our culturally christian fox hole into their culturally non-christian community? (remembering that the U.S. is now post christian and we are no longer the mainstream)

Latwan. If you have it, either way, you must respond....right? More to come on this...it's a process for sure...

But, what do I know?

Life is a moving target....

2011-01-25T19:22:00.000-08:00

People love sayings don't they. "A picture is worth a thousand words." "The eye is the window into the soul." "Our faces reflect what we are looking at."

This evening I was mindlessly watching episodes of The Office on TBS when a Target commercial came on. The tag line of the advertisement (pronounced British style ad-verrrr-tizzzz-mant) was "Life is a moving target."

I was blown away by the theological brilliance of the Target commercial writers! Most people spend their entire adult life seeking safety and security for themselves and their families. Not a bad thing I should think, right? But what if you have no legitimate avenues to pursuing such a lofty goal?

In today's picture you see a young mother from the village of Siksayari, Nicaragua. She lives over a hundred miles by boat from the nearest town that has electricity, cars, or anything resembling modern. We were in this village with a medical team providing care for people who rarely, if ever, receive any kind of qualified care. So, I had to wonder when I I saw this young mother what she was staring at. What is the target that she is trying to hit? In our culture here we seem to all have similar dreams and aspirations in life. But when I look at her face it seems so pensive and uncertain. She really cannot see past today it seems. Even her young son is communicating with us. Is her target as simple as food on the table and no parasites in her children's bellies?

Jesus cares about those who worry, those who hunger, those who are meek, those who are persecuted, those who are sick, and those who don't know what tomorrow brings....(Luke 6:20).

Is there a saying that suffices for her situation? Maybe not, but hopefully an image can help us try to understand...

But, what do I know?

Reflections 101 and such...

2011-01-23T17:09:00.000-08:00

Reflections are complicated sometimes because depending on the medium from which they are cast, the final image mighten not be exactly as the original.

So, as with all trips to Nicaragua I try to spend time reflecting on what happened. Half of the team worked hard on renovations to the Verbo school and spent quality time with the kids of the orphanage. Half of the team went up the Coco river to put on medical clinics in remote Miskito Indian Villages.

The challenge for me has always been, and even more so recently, is to establish what is reality. Is Nicaragua and the lives of the Miskito people reality? Is eating lunch at Wegman's the day after I return reality? Or, if you subscribe to quantum theory, do both realities actually exist in the same time and space with only large amounts of empty space separating us?

One afternoon I was at the beach with 114 orphans swimming in the Caribbean sea and I got stuck on this notion of reflections. As we reflect on what God is doing in Nicaragua, I realized that how I see what God is doing definitely depends on how I, as the reflector, portray the image. Do I really want to know and fully understand what God is doing or do I just want to feel good about my efforts and go home satisfied? Dangerous questions I should think when I read about what Jesus said and did with his closest followers. He offered them the most intimate relationships with God himself and in the same breath demanded everything they had, and were, to be on the team. (John 14:1-4, Luke 14:25-35).

The challenge for me, and all who go, is to ask the dangerous questions: Do we want to be Jesus' closest followers and thus truly change the world, or would we rather be "satisfied" by our efforts?

But, what do I know?

Wednesday in Port...

2011-01-19T19:34:00.000-08:00

The team here in Port is doing well. Lots of hustle and bustle, and in general, there is always so much happening in this community. The Construction team accomplished so much in the school offices. The pictures posted show the guys doing the drywall in the office areas, they are now taping it. The new boys bathroom in the other Verbo school in town has been started and tomorrow the guys will go over and frame it. Also included is a picture of the new tile being laid in the schoolrooms, and grouted. Crews are making great progess on that and should have the floors ready by the time school starts in two weeks. The kids are enjoying their "school vacation" which falls from December through January. We've had different groups of kids doing English lessons in the dining hall. When asked what they would like to be able to say, they had two important questions for us..."When are you leaving?" and "When are you coming back?" We also spent time over at the Orphanage, coloring and decorating name pictures, so that we could take photos of the kids with their name in the picture. (Our eternal quest to remember names continues). We brought oranges for snacks, and of course there was a big mess of peels to clean up afterwards. The couple who take care of the Orpha kids, Jessica and David, are expecting their first child in one week, so there is lots of excitement regarding that. News on the Betania front, the village that Christian Fellowship Church raised funds for to rebuild after the hurricane in 2007, is good. The people there have been begging to come to church, as there is currently no Verbo Church there. Every Sunday Roy, or one of the guys, drives the bus all the way to Betania and picks up a full busload of people, adults and children (about 50+) and brings them to church. After church he drives them all the way back, and the church has been trying to bless them with a snack and a drink to tide them over until they can get home to cook their rice and beans. What a blessing of good fruit from all the investment made there, not only in building and painting their houses, but relationships, working with the children, and the continuing efforts of the Verbo Church here to bless those in the communities around them. Also posted here is a gathering of the women of the church, who once a month join together to pray, and then go out in the community to visit those who need prayer, those struggling in life, and to visit the sick. They bring a basket of items to bless the person they go visit, filled with items like flour, salt, rice, beans and oil. They truly are an example of giving the widow's mite, in that many of the women do not have alot themselves. Their example of giving is a blessing to us. They take taxis to do this, and if they don't have money they walk.

The medical team was travelling back down river today to Krin Krin to do a final clinic there before returning to Waspam and Port Thursday. Thanks for your continued prayers and support, it means a lot to us here. God bless.....

Tuesday Update from Port

2011-01-18T16:59:00.000-08:00

Things are happening for good here in Port. Today the Construction team was able to work on the Teachers and Director's Offices for the school. They finished framing, finished the electrical rough in, and hung drywall on the ceiling.

We did several classes of English Corner with groups of kids in the Dining hall. We are teaching the basics, and making them talk to each other in English. They are smart and catch on quick. We got Empanadas from Oasis restaurant (150!) and the kids loved having the snacks. We colored and played and are happy, tired, and for anyone interested, we are eating the best food in Nicaragua, thanks to the cooks here at Earl's place.

The Medical team reached the village of Sicksayara this morning, and did an 8 hour clinic, seeing patients all day long. They are now setting up their tents and getting some dinner. They plan to head down to Krin Krin tomorrow and do a clinic there. Thanks for all your prayers for their safety, health , strength and wisdom. Keep the prayers coming, it blesses us all here to know we have love and support from home.

God bless and Thanks for sharing with us what God is doing here

in Puerto Cabezas.

Monday in Puerto Cabezas.....

2011-01-17T15:46:00.000-08:00

We've had a great day with the group here in Port. The six team members staying here at the Orphanage were busy and having fun, and working hard. The guys worked over at the School & Church Offices. Crews are continuing to lay tile in the school as part of the improvements. At lunchtime several team members went into town to visit "Arnolfo" the ice cream man, and ordered ice cream for 150 kids and staff. We had a bit of chaos, but we think all the kids got some.

Kayla and Linda worked on English corner lessons with several groups of kids. There are about 15 or so new kids that have recently arrived at the Orphanage from the river villages, and they only speak Miskito. It was fun, and the kids really look forward to speaking with us in English and being able to talk with us more.

The Medical team made great progress up the Rio Coco, and made it as far as San Pedro. They will stay there for the night, and tomorrow morning go the remaining 3 hours to Sicksayara. Keep them all in your prayers as they journey up the river.

They hope to do a clinic in that village before moving back down the river to a village called Yawratengi.

On the Way!

2011-01-16T10:58:00.000-08:00

The team arrived in Porta Cabezas Saturday afternoon, after a long day of traveling. Right now the Medical team is packing up supplies, tents, medicine, and food to take for the expedition on the Rio Coco. They will stay in Waspam this evening, and get on the river early Monday morning. A big blessing is that this trip they are taking a cook from the kitchen with them, to cook for the team while they move from village to village.
We had some fun with the kids at the Orphanage Saturday afternoon. This morning a wonderful service at Verbo Church, which was packed to the gills.
An inspiring message from Pastor Earl challenged us to be "One" with Christ, and to have Unity in the body of Christ.
Thanks for all your prayers for our team, for God's blessing on all the efforts and protection and good health.
The construction team will be working on improvements at the Verbo school, and
a few will do English corner with the kids.
We'll keep you posted as we can!
Nica team Jan 2011

Explaining the Ridiculous

2011-01-06T14:51:00.000-08:00

Context is everything right? Have you ever been telling a hilarious story to people who weren't there for it and when you get to the punch line you only hear crickets chirping though you are breathless with laughter? Okay, so maybe that only happens to me.

During a trip to the remote jungles of Nicaragua I ended up one sunny afternoon conversing with several local men on the front porch of one of their houses. In the midst of our random conversation, as the coconut trees swayed in the strong breeze, they discovered that I was not a farmer and that my job required no real physical labor. One of the men asked, "so why are you so skinny if you don't work?" After fully absorbing this "compliment" I said, "Well, I go to the gym 4-5 times per week."

Now it gets interesting. The guy translating into the Miskito Indian language for me advises that there is no word for gym in their language. He says that I will need to describe it to them. So I said, "Well it's this place where they have heavy weights that I lift. Where they have machines that I run on, but don't go anywhere. Where they have bicycles that I pedal, but don't go anywhere. They even have boats that I row, but are not in any water and also do not go anywhere." One of the men leaned forward as he narrowed his focus and asked, "With all that work in lifting, what are you building?" I replied easily, "nothing." "With all of that lifting, where are you putting those things?" I answered, "right back where I found them."

At that, the one man stood up, scanned the village scene in front of him, and with a straight face said as he walked down the stairs of the porch, "You Americans tell the craziest stories." He strolled away casually without ever looking back.

This morning at CFC, Pastor Kent Williams mentioned the concept of the attractional church and that of the missional church. About 40% of the people around us would be willing to come to our box and experience how we worship, encounter, and learn about the creator God. They are okay with our christian "culture." The other 60% doesn't understand our culture, doesn't speak Christianese, and maybe even has had a bad experience with religion or church. This doesn't mean they are not spiritual though.

The challenge for the missional church is how do we take Jesus outside of the box and into places where our "christian" culture is not spoken nor accepted, but where people are definitely spiritual? How do we talk about Jesus without sounding as ridiculous as I did trying to explain a gym to Miskito Indians in the jungles of Nicaragua?

Stay tuned to the next several messages at CFC (in person or online if you wish www.cfellowshipc.org) to hear more about how we think we can take our church into the missional context while continuing to attract the 40% that will come to the box....

Context is everything right?

But, what do I (or CFC) know?

What Makes You Cry In 2011?

2011-01-03T18:30:00.000-08:00

John 11:33 "When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled."

John 11:35 "Jesus wept."

In mid December I found myself once again in Nicaragua. I was in the Miskito village of Krin Krin on the Coco river. I was there as part of a conference/community gathering hosted by the Verbo Church. Krin Krin is a tough place by most standards. Only accessible by river it has no electricity, no access to clean water, and the population mainly survives by manually farming in the surrounding jungle. The child mortality rate is staggering by world standards.

So one afternoon I was out messing around with my fancy camera and snapped this photo of this little girl crying on her front porch. I wasn't sure why she was crying, but it was pretty obvious that no one was too interested in her current crisis; whatever it was.

In John 11 we read about Jesus' friend Lazarus who died and who later Jesus would bring him back to life. My question has always been why did Jesus weep for the situation? Jesus knew he would raise him from the dead; right? Well during one of my nights trying to sleep in my hammock in Krin Krin I had a little revelation. It was in one of those moments when the gravity of the Miskito people's circumstances piled up just a little too deep on me. I've been traveling to Nicaragua for over 5 years, but sometimes God likes to remind me to feel that hurt again; like the first time I saw it. I won't admit to crying in that moment, but definitely maybe was a little misty-eyed.

But, during my supposed misty-eyedness, I was reminded that Jesus wept. The reason why it hurts to see poverty and need and suffering is because it hurts God. Jesus knew that in the end his friend would come back to life and I know today that eventually, according to the book of Revelations, everything we see wrong today will be transformed and made new without all the suffering, poverty, crying etc.

It hurts because it matters. Right now. Yes God has an eternal plan for transformation, but he definitely cares about how people live today.

It's why we cry. It's why Jesus wept. It's why I get misty-eyed.

But, what do I know?

Crisi Tara (big crazy) Is How We Roll....

2010-12-21T14:37:00.000-08:00

Someone clever once said that there are those who make things happen, those who watch things happen, and those who wonder what happened. Crisi Tara in the Miskito Indian language means "big crazy". The nexus of these two concepts occurred recently in the village of Krin Krin in the jungles of Nicaragua.

Pictured here is Austin Fricker who is a college student from Oregon (he is the middle of a rice field in the jungle along the Coco River). Austin is studying agriculture and is now completing a 3 month stint in Nicaragua working with Miskito farmers as part of his academic program. That's not the crazy part...wait for it.

During Austin's time he has learned a lot about the lives of the Miskito farmers and the struggles they face to etch out a living from the land. Austin has worked hand-in-hand with them clearing new fields from the overgrown jungle and has helped plant future crops. Austin has been using his education to try to help the farmers improve their crop yields. Producing enough food is a daily, and life long, struggle of the Miskito people.

But, Austin learned an even more important lesson in development work: nothing happens fast, especially transformational change. During a porch time chat in Puerto Cabezas, Austin and I agreed that if he really wanted to make a difference for the Miskito farmers he would need a lot more time and be in Nicaragua for several planting/harvesting cycles.

Those of you still waiting for the Crisi part, here it is. Austin has decided, with his family's blessing, to postpone his senior year of college in order to spend a year with the Miskito farmers. He will return to Nicaragua in June for a full year. In a radical decision Austin has also moved into the category of those who "make things happen". As seen in the picture, he has staked his machete in the ground as his symbol of determination.

All of us want to live lives of meaning and purpose and most of us wish we had great stories to tell. Most of us wish we could do big things for God. But that's where it stops for most us. For Austin it's just the beginning because he has decided to do something Crisi Tara and in my experience that is what it takes to "make things happen" on this earth and in God's Kingdom (umm, remember that whole God as man thing with Jesus and he had to die for us etc..)

Who's next for Crisi Tara?

But, what do I know?

Toppling Giants

2010-11-30T10:19:00.000-08:00

Pictured here is Lisa Holliday and Erin Hartley holding "Nuestras Esperanzas." This book is number one in a series of four books designed to teach literacy, basic math, and life skills. This curriculum was adapted from one developed and successfully used in India (click on these links for more info Link 1 and Link 2)

Last week Lisa and Erin trained our first batch of 23 Facilitators in Puerto Cabezas. These are people who have a heart to serve and to see real transformation in their communities; and obviously see education as a key component! These Facilitators will now spend the next month, under Erin's leadership, gathering those who are interested in our target communities to be a part of a class.

The facilitators will teach in pairs and so we hope to start at least 10 different classes of up to 30 students the week of January 3rd, 2011. These are truly exciting times in Nicaragua! As you remember the "E" in the PEACE plan stands for Educate the next generation. This "E" is how we plan to topple the Giant of Illiteracy in Nicaragua. (On a side note, please do not believe most stats you find on the Internet about literacy in Nicaragua, I have first hand knowledge of how bad it is in the North Atlantic Autonomous Region) In order to educate the next generation we must also educate this generation. We must help develop a culture of education and a system for supporting the kids of the communities as they move up through the education system.

It's been a whirlwind five months for Lisa and Erin as they adapted and produced this first book into Spanish for the Nicaraguan culture. Being that there is no rest for the weary, they are already working on book two as book one prepares to hit the field. Also during this time, a Miskito man, named Marcos, is working to translate the book into the Miskito language to be used in the remote communities where Spanish is not a priority.

So pause a minute and celebrate this incremental success with our Literacy/Life Skills Team!

PEACE update video

2010-11-29T11:29:00.000-08:00

Below is a video update from Nicaragua on CFC's Peace Plan. This segment focuses on our for-profit business called PEACE Corporation.

Birth of Communitas

2010-11-24T11:11:00.000-08:00

As Day 3 is in full swing of our Literacy/Life Skills Teacher Training program in Puerto Cabezas, I am seeing another unique phenomenon occurring: communitas.

Communi-who? Exactly, the spell check on my blogger does not even recognize it. Communitas is not to be confused with community. Community is just merely people who share common interest and live in proximity to each other's lives.

Communitas is something much more special and honestly, I think Godly. Communitas is that thing you see among soldiers who have survived war together. It's that thing you see among a championship team after winning the ultimate contest. It's what happens when a group of people find themselves in new territory and sacrifice and struggle together, even if it cost them everything, to move forward and win the day for their cause.

It's something we should see among the people of God.

As I watched the class of teachers eat lunch together I could see their minds working. I could see them discussing, "what if this holistic plan, that includes Literacy, could really change our communities?" "Are we willing to sacrifice together to see it happen?" "Is God really asking us regular people to change our communities with God's strength like Dustin said just a few minutes ago?"

These questions are the beginning of communitas for this group of world-changers. Soon they will enter into the contest together of unlocking thousands from the cage and indignity of illiteracy. They will go through trials together. They will suffer defeats together. They will combat the skeptics together. But ultimately they will win the day together and experience the true form of communitas which is reserved for those who give everything to see "your Kingdom come, your will be done, on Earth as it is in Heaven." (Matthew 6:10)

But, what do I know?

Soul Awake

2010-11-23T08:28:00.000-08:00

When I was a child watching cartoons I always loved that moment when one of the characters, let's say Bugs Bunny, experienced a moment of revelation. You know the scene right? The imaginary light bulb appears above Bug's head, then the light illuminates, and then out comes the idea or the solution to whatever quagmire Bug's finds himself in. And I love it when the Road Runner goes....wait never mind, focus.

This week in Nicaragua our Literacy/Life Skills Team, Erin and my wife Lisa, are putting on the first Teachers Training Program. The TTP is the course that volunteers from the community, and the church, must go through in order to be one of the teachers to use the Literacy/Life Skills curriculum that our team adapted from one developed in India.

What makes this curriculum quite unique is that it is designed to be dialogical. The format of using the curriculum is implicitly interactive and intends for the learners to make numerous discoveries on their own. This style of teaching breaks long traditions in education here in Nicaragua. In general, the teacher just conveys information and the student copies it down. The test of their knowledge is whether they can regurgitate the copied items back upon request. There is very little interaction or discussion of ideas or even the notion of debating the thoughts of the teacher.

So back to Bugs. What has been exciting is to watch Lisa and Erin training the volunteer teachers these new ways of educating. They love it! All over the classroom you can light bulbs coming on! But then I noticed in a lot of the side conversations during breaks, that it's going deeper than just light bulbs. There is a true passion developing around this curriculum as they begin to dream about when they start using it in their communities. They are starting to see that it can truly raise the consciousness of their people; that it can truly begin to equip them to tackle the struggles of their lives for themselves; that it can bring back the dignity and self-actualization that they lost somewhere.

Instead of cartoonish light bulbs, I am seeing souls awakened. I am seeing regular people being transformed into not merely "teachers", but facilitators! They will be facilitating transformation from among the people and with the people. That's how Jesus did it. He was incarnational and awakened people's souls to change the world.

But what do I know?

Jesus came to Disambiguate

2010-11-17T10:02:00.000-08:00

Disambiguate- verb - to remove the ambiguity from; make unambiguous.

A few weeks ago I wrote a post about Jesus the Bartender and I was inspired to continue in that thread of the many essences of Jesus; according to me that is...

When you dive into the narrative of the bible you see a people chosen by God to receive the law from God in order that they may live righteously and be able to bless the rest of the world. As you fight your way through the old testament trying to understand it you discover that it didn't quite work out. You learn that in man's attempt to be religious in order to please God that in fact our religion becomes the very thing that can separate us from God's mission on this earth. The Israelites had all of the religiosity right at times but had missed the message; God's heart is to redeem this world back to himself, we are his creation.

Jesus came to disambiguate. Jesus came on the scene as a radical. He and his disciples broke the law routinely for the sake of his message (i.e Matthew 12). Jesus talked to people he wasn't supposed to according to the righteous leaders of the time and spent time with the sinners in their homes (Luke 5:27). But why? Because he was trying to disambiguate his father's (God in heaven) message to the world. Religion had made the message of God's love and grace for us ambiguous to the world. Religion had become something you just do rather than something that changes your life and gives you a new identity in God.

Maybe it's time to draw a line in the sand? Maybe it's time to disambiguate Jesus' message to the world and what his life meant. How do we reach the people who aimlessly drive by our church and see it as an ambiguous box full of people they don't understand? What if it means it's time to get radical again; like the way Jesus started a movement of God back in the day? I think it's an exciting challenge to reposition church as something relevant to this broken world. To take the good news of the gospel into new context; the areas where the people there will never be interested in coming into our ambiguous building.

More on this to come...but for now let's just stew on that for a bit.

But, what do I know?

Face Time

2010-11-11T12:53:00.000-08:00

"Faces reflect the world they've been looking at." --Peter Egan (freelance writer)

"The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light." --Matthew 6:22

This afternoon I was perusing iphoto looking for pictures to be used in another project I am working on and ran across the one here. It just so happens that this morning I had read the quote above and later read the scripture quoted from Matthew; quite a coincidence one could surmise.

My thoughts immediately took me to Nicaragua as I wondered what it would be like to see Nicaragua from her perspective. This little girl lives in the village of Betania which is one of the communities we are focusing on first with the PEACE plan through our partnership with Verbo, Puerto Cabezas. In this stolen moment I think her face reflects the world she's looking at. A lot is at stake if nothing changes in her world. Her face and eyes are the reason why God's vision for Betania is so big, and holistic, that it gets me up early in the morning and keeps me up late at night. Sounds so melodramatic, I know, I wrote it...

The every day faces around us back here reflect what they have been looking at also. When you see what is reflected in your friends faces who do not know Jesus, what do you see. I see a lot of hurt. I see unanswered questions about identity. I see the fall out of broken relationships. I see regret of all sorts. I see bitterness towards religion. I see....

Jesus began his earthly ministry by announcing that the Kingdom of God was near (Mark 1). Later he would tell us that it is within us! (Luke 17). Traditionally churchy folks would go after their friends souls with all kinds of well thought out apologetics and polemics while trying to pretend like we have all the answers to their life's problems. Let me know how that went for you... What if the problem is not the problems? What if its a Kingdom problem? We want to save our friends by rushing them to some sort of "saving" prayer and then tell them later what's it all about.

Here's a new thought for you. Start small. Address the primary issue that their faces reflect what they have been looking at. They're not facing the Kingdom of God that Jesus proclaimed the arrival of. If they're not facing it, they can't (or as my friend Sha-Donna says in her southern accent 'Cayn't' ) see it. They can't see what your talking about. It's why addressing the physical along with the spiritual in Betania is so important. That little girl needs to see what the Kingdom of God looks like first. She needs to see a place without hunger, without parasites, without desperate parents. Like wise your friends need to see what the Kingdom looks like for them. Should it look like religious dogma and condemnation? Is that was Jesus proclaimed or did he proclaim freedom for prisoners and binding up the broken hearted? (Isaiah 61)

Get them facing the Kingdom first by how you authentically love them, listen to them, and do life with them. Remember, the Kingdom of God is within you, it's yours to show! Always speak truth seasoned with grace (Colossians 4:6) and watch as God's spirit draws them unto himself as they takes steps towards the Kingdom.

But, what do I know?

Fuzzy People

2010-10-26T09:35:00.001-07:00

So yesterday I was running around Puerto Cabezas shooting photos and taking video for an upcoming PEACE plan update at CFC. I happen to catch this guy tying re-bar in preparation for pouring concrete pillars on the new orphanage building.

Funny how the camera chose to focus on the re-bar and not the guy doing the work (settle down camera people, I know what you're thinking). Is the story the work or the guy? Is it the plan or the people? God's plan or man's plan? Who's on first?

I realized that I have had through the years fuzzy people in my life. You know, that guy you work with who had the problem with the thing that one time when....well what happened to that guy, let alone, what was his name anyways? I don't remember. Many times I am so focused on ________ that everyone else gets out of focus and just become fuzzy people.

Jesus told us to open our eyes, look around, people are all around us waiting for us to love them and bring them in to focus (John 4:35). People are hurting right next to you and probably feel a little fuzzy.

Open your eyes, bring them in to focus....today.

But, what do I know?

(In case you were wondering...his name is Juan, and yes I know him)

Ghandhi Goes Violent

2010-10-19T16:45:00.000-07:00

The difference between what we do and what we are capable of doing would suffice to solve most of the world's problem.
Mohandas Gandhi

This might end up being the shortest blog post I have ever written. Firstly because I'm in Nicaragua and there's no power and my laptop battery is dying, but mostly because I think Gandhi just smacked us in the face...to which what can you say? (especially considering his whole mantra was non-violence)

In the realm of outreach or missions or whatever you call it, there are always big discussions and lengthy speeches about the best way to "change" the world. Community development is all the rage (we're doing it). You can get masters' degrees in the stuff. And yet a couple decades of it and some of the results are disappointing.

I think a big part of it is lack of engagement. We don't need any more knowledge or trends as there is "nothing new under the sun." What we need is a Ghandhi smack. If we could do what we are capable of, which is pretty much everything, instead of what we do (insert what you do), then a lot of change would happen. God already told us how to change the world. Bring the Kingdom of God and all of its fullness to world.

We are capable of that. Jesus said we would do more than he did. But is it what we do?

But, what do I know

Escape Plan

2010-10-17T06:31:00.000-07:00

Going back a few posts ago (Ends of the Earth..) you'll remember that as part of our holistic plan in Nicaragua, we are in the process of adapting a literacy and life skills curriculum from one developed and used extensively in India.

The adaptation process is rapidly advancing. The curriculum consists of four books. Book one has been fully translated, culturally adapted, and now we are setting it up for publishing within the next three weeks.

As part of ensuring that the curriculum will be well received and prolifically used, the team lead for this project, Erin, has been meeting with Miskito cultural experts and discussing the project. Just yesterday, Erin was meeting with several of these key leaders (as seen in the pics) to discuss the barriers to escaping poverty and spiritual lostness that face the Miskito people of Nicaragua.

It was great to hear of how the meeting proceeded. Through their discussion they identified the five global giants that keep the Miskito people trapped in poverty, corruption, and spiritual darkness.

They all agreed that the literacy/life-skills curriculum will be a key part of this process of raising the people's consciousness and bringing back their dignity that has been taken from them.

When the people see what they are capable of, even with meager resources, and they begin to experience a God who is powerful and loves them, true life and community transformation will and must happen!

But, what do I know?

3days for Breast Cancer

2010-10-07T09:49:00.001-07:00

This weekend is the Susan G. Komen 3day walk for breast cancer. Last year my wife Lisa, who is a 2x's cancer survivor, entered the walk and completed all 60 miles. It was somewhat of a miracle considering her struggles with neuropathy in her feet which is a lingering result of her chemotherapy (it's painful and feels like your feet are asleep). This year Lisa and I have volunteered as crew for the 3day event and will be driving one of the sweeper vans picking up those who need a little boost. Below is a short statement from Lisa at the end of last year's walk...in her own words why she did it.

Bartender Jesus

2010-09-29T10:11:00.000-07:00

Bartender Jesus. Sounds almost like an action figure from a biblical cartoon gone wrong; or maybe even a bit sacreligious? Nevertheless I met him the other day at a local restaurant near my home. My wife and I had just made a 7 hour roadtrip from NY and wanted a quick bite to eat, so we went straight into our local restaurant and sat at the bar. The bartender who works there is named "John." On previous visits to the restaurant I had noticed that John was a supremely friendly guy and brought smiles to every customer. He seemed to remember returning clients well and even seemed to know a little bit about their lives. John exuded some kind of inate joy and happiness that people were attracted to.

Oddly enough, he seemed to remember us though it had been several months since we had last been there. As we conversed for a few moments I was compelled to dig into his life a little. John was quite excited to learn I worked for a church and that I did missions. I honestly was a little shocked. Why would a heathen bartender like the fact that I work for a church? I had to know, so I interrupted and asked him where did he get his inner joy that was so evident? He said "Jesus Christ, the one who changed my life!" Say what?

His answer should not have shocked me. Jesus was a bartender once himself (John 2) and chose the act of turning water into wine as one of his first miraculous signs. John's life is a challenge to mine. John does not really attend church but he knows Jesus and what he has done for him and is letting his light shine before all men. He was ready to give an account for the reason for his joy (1 Peter 3:15). And considering what Jesus said to the Pharisees in Mark 2:17, is John (or I or you) supposed to be hanging out in holy huddles or sharing our joy in the "world." Hudson Taylor, the famous missionary to China said, "I'd rather burn my candle in a room of darkness, than one full of light." I'm embarrassed that I have to wonder if John the bartender is a better witness than me. Do other's see my joy and inquire about it?

I hope John stays right where he is at, just like Bartender Jesus would have...

But, what do I know?

Loads of Transformation...

2010-09-28T11:28:00.000-07:00

Imagine you are trying to get a place or people from their broken realities of what "is" to a place where the Kingdom of God has crashed straight into their lives and moved them to "transformed." Is to Transformed. That is the whole message of Jesus. The Kingdom of God is here. When you look at those living without Jesus and add to the mix severe poverty, I think you have a good picture of the "is". When you dream about a place where people are living in the freedom of Jesus and a place without the dehumanizing affects of poverty; then you are seeing "transformed."

Now, my favorite way to get from here to there is by car. I love driving. So imagine we are building a car to carry a whole bunch of people from "is" to "transformed". This car we are building starts with the two axles and their wheels. One axle is Christian Fellowship Church and one axle is Verbo Church (Puerto Cabezas). The steel frame that connects the two axles is our church to church relationship built upon several years of doing ministry together. The rest of the car can only be built upon this strong foundation. As you see the rest of the car take shape: they body, the doors, the windows, the steering wheel; these are the other organizations, experts, NGO's, other non-profits, that we are leveraging to make this a great car with huge capacity for transformation.

Ultimately, what moves the car down the road to transformationville? The engine of course! That's where today's photo enters in. The engine of our car is PEACE Incorporated. Just a few weeks ago we finalized the process of incorporating a for-profit charitable business in Nicaragua complete with an Import/Export license. We plan to use various for-profit ventures to drive our car forward in Nicaragua. In the process of funding our PEACE initiatives , this engine will also allow the Verbo church to become fully self-sustaining and self-funded.

One of the first business ventures is the used clothing industry. PEACE Inc is purchasing high quality used clothing from Door of Hope to be shipped in bale form to Nicaragua. In Nicaragua, PEACE Inc will sell the baled clothing to local retailers in Puerto Cabezas and potentially in Managua also. This business has great potential for generating a steady cash flow stream to fund our PEACE initiatives and create several jobs within Nicaragua.

The big news is that our first container of clothes was shipped out from the U.S. late last week and is on its way to Nicaragua as we speak (picture is of the bales loaded inside the sea container). We believe this new paradigm in the making is a great vision from God and have already seen his hand at work in bringing it to bear.

There will be several other ventures springing out of PEACE Inc as we go forward and I will share about those as they happen. This plan has been 10 months in the making and it is exciting to see it moving into the execution phase!

"Conflicted" in the Middle East

2010-09-25T12:55:00.000-07:00

So it's a sunny afternoon and I am in Long Island, NY for a wedding less than 24hrs from returning from 2 weeks in the middle east. "Culture Shock" is an understatement. After more than 40 hrs without sleep I was not sure how to update you on our time there...so today I am stealing a great word from my friend Erin (pictured center). Erin had never been to the middle east and humbly admitted to know very little about the people and situations there. All the more why her words are great as they are an unbiased raw reaction to the people and places there...

"To see the places where Jesus walked will make any believer stand amazed at his presence. It’s an awesome experience that inevitably makes the Bible come alive and gives us a hunger to know more. But as followers of Christ, awe should never be our final emotion. If we stop there we are ignoring the reality of the situation today and God’s call on our lives. We are meant to marvel at the awesomeness of our Father and then ask “What now?” “How can I feed Your sheep?” The people of the “Holy Land” today live in a very unholy state. 2000 years ago Jesus stood in Jerusalem and proclaimed liberty and freedom to all people, yet today the people live in bleak oppression.

One group, still recovering from centuries of hate and discrimination, lives in a conflicted state, rejoicing to finally have a land of their own that reconnects them with the culture they’ve fought so hard to preserve, but always slaves to the lingering guilt that the establishment of their new country has displaced others who used to live there. The reactions of the newly displaced people vary. Some react with acts of violence, bringing about the construction of giant walls to prevent similar attacks in the future. While others have resigned to simply exist behind these walls, with no hope for change, peace or the freedom that Jesus proclaimed. To say that the conflict is complicated and overwhelming is an understatement. However, no task was ever too daunting for Jesus.

Paul writes, “For he himself is our peace…and has broken down in his flesh the dividing wall of hostility…so that in himself he might make the two into one new man, thus establishing peace. “ We believe that Jesus himself is peace, so why do we hesitate to introduce others to him? The enemy has tricked us into believing that our fight is against Muslims, yet the reality is that both Christianity and Islam revolve around the same basic teaching: to seek the straight path to the God of Abraham and live a life surrendered in devotion to him. Striving toward the same goal, we live in enmity and strife, while the true enemy sits back and watches contently.

But the light is dispelling the darkness. God has revealed that the good news of Jesus is evident even in the Quran, and faithful believers are boldly putting this revelation into practice, forming friendships with Muslims all over the world to share in relational loving-kindness and ultimately share the gift of true life with them. The sweetest part is that the final word always belongs to the Lord, as they humbly step back and allow him to speak to these new friends in visions or dreams, showing them that he is knowable, personable, and living and, more importantly, that He wants to know them. In 2 short weeks, I was exposed to both the awful reality of the struggle in the Middle East and a group of passionate believers that are pursuing peace with force through an anointed method that invites all who are thirsty to enter the Kingdom of God. Reflecting on all of this, how can I not be a part of it? I think that God has specific calls on all our lives, but he also controls what we are exposed to, and knows what sets our hearts on fire. He wants us to feed his sheep, and what better way to do that than to seek the straight path to him with our new friends, hand in hand."

But, what do I (we) know?

Wall to Wall

2010-09-11T23:25:00.000-07:00

Last evening we arrived in Jerusalem, had dinner, and then hit the streets of the old city Jerusalem. Because of the holiday the shops etc were mostly closed. We eventually found ourselves at the famous "wailing" wall. This is some of the most contested real estate in the world. Google and wikipedia can tell you all about that.

Being Sept 11th yesterday, it was an interesting experience to be at the nexus of some of the holiest sites of Judaism, Islam, and Christianity. At the wall it only seemed appropriate to pray for Peace. Peace has a lot of different definitions that really depends on which side of the wall you are on. Literally.

The next morning (Sunday) we started by visiting the holocaust museum in west Jerusalem. I'm sure this does not require any explanation, but...yet it does. About half way through the experience I had reached my limit to absorb the images and stories of the suffering endured by the Jews. In one image a Jewish women stood with her back to a soldier while holding a small child in her arms. The soldier behind her fired his rifle execution style striking her in the head; all while other soldiers stood my smoking cigarettes. I didn't look at the rest of the exhibits. I felt that image should stay fresh...

After lunch we headed into Bethlehem and went to one of the Palestinian refugee camps. There we met with an NGO attempting to help the Palestinians establish some resemblance of "normal" life inside the camp. As you of course know, these Palestinians live inside a security wall built to establish peace and security between Israel and Palestine. Pictured left is the view from their neighborhood. We spoke with locals and learned of the struggles to survive with no freedom to leave the city and very little ability to make ends meet in a city with a dead economy that has no access to outside market systems. This wall is covered in graffiti with the wailings of the Palestinians.

The word of the day was "conflicted". I don't pretend to understand all the intricacies in this part of the world, but I am convinced of a few things. God loves the Jews. God loves the Palestinians. God loves me. God loves you. Only if we are all living in the Kingdom of God will there be transformation in peoples' lives and their communities.

If somehow we could all find the path into the Kingdom of God together, be it Jew, Muslim, or Christian; and if we truly lived it out in our lives, then there would be no need to wail at any wall....

But, what do I know?

ends of the earth....literally...

2010-09-06T11:59:00.000-07:00

A lot has been happening in Nicaragua since we established our long-term partnership in January of this year with the Verbo church in Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua. Here's an update on some recent exciting happenings...

We are moving forward at a rapid pace in putting together a literacy and life skills training curriculum. We are working to adapt an extremely successful series of four books that were originally developed in India by Mission India and Seva Bharat. In all my travels and research I have never come across a curriculum that is so ingenious in it's style of instruction and it's use of thematic threads that truly raise the consciousness of the student. The series teaches the student how to read, do basic math, personal/community hygiene, addresses cultural issues, and more.

Pictured left is my wife Lisa and our friend Erin. Erin is the team leader for adapting the curriculum to the Miskito culture. Erin's story is quite crazy and amazing at the same time. Not only did she major in Spanish, but she also lived in a remote Miskito village for over a year...by herself! She is fluent in the Miskito language and has unique insights into the culture. Lisa's role on the team will be publishing the work and later training the trainers with Erin in Nicaragua. Lisa has 6 years of experience as an educator which will be invaluable as we go forward. The other team member is Marcos Padilla. Marcos is a Miskito man who holds a Master's Degree and is an educator in Puerto Cabezas. He will be involved at all stages to ensure accuracy and in implementing the curriculum when it's ready.

First it will be done in Spanish for the Miskito culture and then in the Miskito language for the Miskito culture. This curriculum is a crucial part of our holistic plan for the North Atlantic Autonomous Region of Nicaragua. It will be a building block on top of which we can introduce all types of initiatives such as micro-enterprise development and personal/community hygiene training to name a couple.

As you can see in the pictures, Erin and Lisa found themselves in Hyderabad, India for 10 days as part of this program. Who would have guessed that we'd have to go to India to teach literacy in Nicaragua!? Seva Bharat invited them to come and be trained on how to train the trainers; that's a lot of trains! What an awesome experience they had in being able to see the curriculum in use in it's original context. This experience is crucial in properly adapting to our intended context.

In India you never know what's going to happen next. In your first experience there it can be a little overwhelming actually. The second picture here is taken from an Indian newspaper. That's right, Erin and Lisa randomly ended up meeting the minister of tourism and suddenly a massive photo shoot ensued! Apparently they were the only "tourists" in the area and so the Indian's seized the opportunity. Lisa commented later that it felt like a Forest Gump moment; just stumbling blindly into a media scene!

Well, we hope to have the first book published in time to train the first batch of trainers in late November...I'll keep you updated on that.

There is also exciting news on other fronts and I will post those over the next few days.

Friday update from Nica (Last Day)

2010-07-16T20:47:00.000-07:00

Today was the team's last day in Puerto Cabezas. Tomorrow morning they fly back to Managua and then on to the U.S. An interesting thing happens when you board the jet in Managua to head home.

The second the plane door is closed and locked, there is a literal and metaphoric barrier between us and what happened here in Nicaragua this week. Everything about our lives back home try to make us forget this place and these people. Our lives are busy. Our jobs need our attention. The T.V. serves only our materialism and narcissism.

Our challenge as a short term team is to figure out ways to bring Nicaragua back with us. We have been exposed to lives much different than ours where the needs and struggles are almost too much to bear. One Miskito man answered "sabes la lucha" when I asked how he was. His answer translated was, "you know, 'the struggle'" I pretended to know what he meant; but I didn't.

My challenge to our team is to sense the responsibility they have to tell the stories of what is happening here both good and bad. God is doing amazing things already, but as we discussed yesterday, there is much to do yet. We need to seek God's direction as to what our role will be in the greater mission to see the Kingdom of God made real here.

Tonight we had to say our goodbyes to the kids of the orphanage. To celebrate our time to together we bought ice cream for all 109 kids and 20 team members! After eating ice cream we played music and danced. We took 4 million pictures (loose estimate). We exchanged notes and home made cards. There were many hugs given and received.

The blessing in this time is that these parties used to be a bitter sweet event. I remember the first team trip here in 2006. The kids at the orphanage had never experienced a team like ours that came only to focus on them. The last night of that trip was full of tears and full-tilt crying.

Now, after four years of teams, the kids have learned well that the "grupos de Dustin" will be back soon. Of course there is still emotions involved, but you can also sense the happiness they have in the knowledge that we are here for the long term to love them through our relationships with them.

I think a lot of team members, and people back home, find it a little surprising that serving God and following His example can be as simple as flying to Nicaragua and loving some kids. Sometimes it's that simple; just look at the pictures...

But, what do I know?

Thursday Nica Trip update

2010-07-16T08:38:00.000-07:00

Psalms 113:7 says, "He raises the poor from the dust and lifts the needy from the ash heap;"

Have you ever wondered how He does that? What was his plan for that? If that is what His word says, then why are there so many poor people in the world?

I have wondered these things in the past, but honestly I think about the "why" lest often today. I think about it lest often because I have searched the word of God thoroughly on this matter and have developed an opinion that most theologians would agree with. (big statement I know, and frankly I would still have the same opinion even if 'they' didn't)

It seems that the word of God is clear that His plan was His church. Church being the body of Christ; being all those who proclaim faith is Jesus as the word of God who rose from the dead and was the atonement for all of our sins.

So who is to act on this promise from God in Psalms? You and I. And so with conviction of this belief our team used $1000 of our team money to purchase bulk food for 200 families in one of the poorest communities in Puerto Cabezas. They call it Caminante. The people who live there have mostly come from remote villages seeking work in the "city." They find none and end up living in shanties made of tin and sometimes only plastic and tree limbs.

About 30 of the older kids from the orphanage came with our team out to Caminante to deliver the food. Though these kids have nothing of their own, their hearts were serve those with even less!

On Friday (now today) we will finish painting the church offices and then after lunch we are taking over 100 kids from the orphanage to the beach for an afternoon of fun and communitas!

Tonight we will celebrate our week together with the kids with a giant ice-cream party and latin dancing!

See you tomorrow...

Wed Nica trip update (life in the margins)

2010-07-14T20:51:00.000-07:00

This morning the team resumed work on the church offices. They had the pleasure of hanging dry wall on the ceiling in the upstairs section where it is quite warm without the A/C installed yet. As you can tell from this great picture it took a lot of team work and coordination.

On the main floor a lot of painting continued. It is becoming quite the color office space with about 4 different bright Caribbean colors represented!

Tomorrow morning the team will spend time packing up food that we will later deliver to families in need in the community of Caminante.

The team finished the day after dinner with a time of bible study and reflecting of what they have been experiencing during this trip. Several team members shared how getting to know some of the orphans has touched their hearts in a unique way.

In my travels around the world I definitely agree with what other's say: orphans are some of the most marginalized people in the world. Pictured left is little Gustavo. Gustavo came to the orphanage not too long ago when his only surviving parent passed away. He has two older relatives here at the orphanage also.

Without this ministry Gustavo would be on the street trying to survive in the "margins". When you look at his face it should be no surprise that God spoke so much about caring for those living in the margins; specifically orphans. The bible tells us that if no family is able or willing then the church must provide for them and so Verbo does. What a blessing to be able to support something that God cares about.

But, what do I know?

Tuesday blog update from Nica

2010-07-13T21:13:00.000-07:00

Today several team members had the opportunity to ride into town with one of the leaders to go and buy paint supplies. For those who have not been here, traveling into town and being among the locals is an experience full of sensory input. Driving along the road you will see images like the one posted on the left. Rusted tin roof, simple wood construction, poorly dressed child sitting on the porch, stray dog forging, muddy pathways here and there.

One of the team members commented tonight that the experience was extremely eye opening. She is a teach by trade and loves history. She said that it was hard to see it with her own eyes that people here still live like they did 200 years ago; having no electricity, running water, and using an out-house.

She was adamant that upon her return to the U.S. that she would be attempting to teach her students about this new reality she had seen with her own eyes. You might even say that she has now entered into Liminality (see previous post on Liminality). How will it continue to change her this week I wonder?

Also pictured is our fearless team leader, Daws and his wife Jennifer. They were leading by example on site of our work project to finish painting the new church offices which will also house PEACE Inc. which is a for-profit, charitable business that we are currently starting to fuel Verbo's vision of holistic ministry. More on this later possibly.

After the kids finished their homework/tutoring time our team headed over to play some games and do some crafts. The weather has been very wet and so we have been limited to in-door type activities. The kids are so ready to get out and play some sports or go to the beach or anything outside!

Tomorrow morning we will be working on the church office some more and then also packing up about 2000lbs of food that we will later distribute to poor families in the area on Thursday.

Catch you later...

Communitas (blog update from Nica Team)

2010-07-12T20:21:00.000-07:00

Today was a rainy, rainy day. We were not able to play any outdoor games, but instead spent time working on crafts that some of the team members had prepared ahead of time.

At lunch time, we took the team for a tour of Puerto Cabezas and then had lunch at a restaurant over looking the beach. The rain stopped for a while so several of the team members went for a swim.

Communitas sounds like some sort of Tech company or Internet provider to boot. However, it's another one of those clever terms, like liminality, that have greatly helped me understand what happens in Nicaragua.

Communitas is what happens when a group of people come together under a common purpose or set of beliefs to accomplish a cause greater than themselves and in that process experience a special level of togetherness or community. ( Again, don't check me on Wiki, just roll with it!) . Pictured here today is one of the young girls on our team named Julia. Julia is already making an impact with the kids at the orphanage. They commented to me yesterday that she is the happiest visitor they have known and that more of us should be like her. They added that compared to Julia some of us looked sad! Pictured with Julia is Isabelle. Isabelle is a lady from the Verbo Church that speaks english and translates for many of our teams.

As you can tell, Julia has already made friends with Isabelle. What's awesome is the Communitas that occurs when Julia and Isabelle are together. They share the common goal of reaching out to the kids at the orphanage, but they can only accomplish it together. Julia brings so much love and energy, but she needs Isabelle to "translate" it so that nothing is lost in the communication. Don't miss this: Communitas is not just working together or spending time together as sometimes we use the term " community" in the church world. It is the ultimate sense of true community that can only occur when working together under a common cause (envision the camaraderie among soldiers). I believe Communitas is something we are innately wired for. Where can you find yours?

I think you can see it in Julia's and Isabelle's eyes better than I can explain it.

But, what do I know?

Nica Trip Sunday Update

2010-07-11T20:48:00.000-07:00

This morning we flew on the 6:30 flight from Managua to Puerto Cabezas. Everything went smooth and all of our luggage came with us. Even better, though huge thunder clouds loomed every where in sight on approach into to Port, we didn't hit any bumps!

Tomorrow the kids are out of school and we hope to go to the beach or the river with them if the weather is clear and the roads are dried up a little.

Continuing our discussion of Liminality from yesterday, I wanted to dive into how this applies to the Nicaraguans. (Oh, you didn't know this was a discussion?)

Over the past 4 years of seeing our teams interact with the orphans, I realized that the experience challenges the kids here to move into their uncharted waters just like us. Remember that a majority of these kids have heart breaking stories of abandonment, hunger, abuse, or loneliness to name a few.

So to interject 20 foreigners into their lives for a week and essentially ask them to trust in us and believe that we mean the best for them is truly transitional; it's Liminality. The orphans find themselves in a relational place in which they are given the opportunity to love again, to be loved again, and to allow themselves to be kids again. They are given the opportunity to choose to grow through the experience and into a new reality.

Sounds pretty grandiose. I know, I just wrote it and thought the same thing. But in reality it's not a stretch and I have 4 years of loving these kids to prove it. I could write story after story of relationships that kids in this orphanage have with people like us and how those relationships have helped them begin to re-define their reality; new self-image, new hope for future opportunities.

For those of you back home, where in your life do you need to move towards Liminality in order to experience a fresh reality? Just ask God.

But, what do I know?

Limi--whaaaa?

2010-07-10T16:06:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting here in Managua, Nicaragua waiting for the next CFC Team to arrive at the airport where I'll receive them and get them over to the hotel for the night. Tomorrow morning we fly early to Puerto Cabezas on the east coast in time to make the morning worship service at La Iglesia Cristiana Verbo.

Pictured left is the bird's eye view of Puerto Cabezas.

So, what's the title all about? Well this afternoon I was reflecting on liminality. Limi--whaaaa? Exactly. But seriously it applies to what we're doing in Nicaragua with this team.

Don't check me on Wikipedia, but Liminality essentially speaks to the condition of being at the limits of your reality and in between transitioning to a different status. (or life etc). This theory involves what happens to people when they are on the edge of their comfort zone and experiencing change during transitional periods. Examples given in some text to explain this is when a young tribal boy in Africa goes through a right of passage in which he is expelled from the village and forced to survive without any help. If the boy survives the ordeal and returns, they he has passed through the transition and is now a man. It is in Liminality that the boy is most open to learning and growing, out of necessity of course. This often also involves great levels of introspection and a new self-awareness.

To a certain extent, and hopefully so honestly, participants in our trips experience liminality. We are placed in a new environment and in a reality that our normal modes of behavior and perspectives may not work. Just like the would-be man in Africa, our new context in Nicaragua forces us to be open to new perspectives and adapt to a new reality.

It's during this period that I believe God can work the most. In Liminality we are stripped of the normal filters that our lives back home have put over our eyes and it seems that most people experience God in a new refreshing way; most often in a new challenging way!

So what about the Nicaraguan's? Do they care about Liminality? Let's talk more tomorrow.....

But, What do I know?

video from Nica

2010-04-05T08:57:00.001-07:00

Just a few clips from our kids in Port giving their greetings to their friends in the U.S.

Friday update from Nica

2010-04-03T07:08:00.000-07:00

We spent our last day full of activities with the kids at the orphanage. Plenty of competitive sports, face painting, and crafts.

Last night we had a grand fiesta with kids. Ear's wife, Damaris, prepared a special meal for all 107 kids and 36 team members! We all ate together in the new dining hall and outside. I think the number of digital pictures taken probably exceeded 10,000...more or less.

After we finished eating, the music started pumping and the dancing began. Everyone had a blast a "Club Verbo" :)

Pictured above is little Samuel trying to break into his orange drink! I was laughing hysterically watching the process. Below him his Maryelly with her special dinner.

During the day on Friday I had the opportunity to drive Oscar to see his family on the Rio Coco near Waspam. What a special time of reunion. Oscar lived here at the orphanage since 1997 and is now in Managua going to college to studying engineering. His grandmother, who raised him his first 7 years, was so joyous to see him. She said that he is the famous one of the family since he is attending the college and has a bright future.

As Oscar and I spoke on his porch he stated clearly that as soon as he was able he would pass his good fortune of opportunities back to help his extended family.

Saturday the team will all be traveling back to the U.S. in time for Easter services tomorrow at home.

See you next time....

Thurs Nica Trip update

2010-04-01T21:48:00.000-07:00

Today we started off the morning with another bible story with great props to act out the story. At 11:30 we headed to the beach for more fun in the sun and a picnic style lunch. It has been fun to hear the team members calling the kids by name as they played and shared stories. In less than a week many team members have made new friends that they will not forget.

Tomorrow morning we are starting off with an easter egg hunt! The rest of the day will be free time for games, some more crafts, and to just spend time with "our kids".

See you tomorrow with more pictures and maybe some video!

Wed Nica trip update

2010-03-31T15:08:00.000-07:00

Today the team spent all day doing activities with the kids. In the morning we did crafts and sports. We had some great volleyball matches!

Later on it seemed the popular thing to do was to use the fabric markers to sign each other's shirts. I know our team members will enjoy having those keepsakes!

In the afternoon we had more games and then made tie dye t shirts. The kids love playing with the different colors. We will see how they come out later.

At around 3pm, Jeff and I purchased and delivered 107 ice cream pops for the kids at the orphanage. It was a great snack on this hot sunny day.

Tonight team has a little down time after dinner just to hang out and have social time as a team. I think this will help us gather our energy to give 110% to the end of our trip!

See you tomorrow.

zumba class with the older girls!

2010-03-30T22:06:00.001-07:00

Leigh Anne, Stephanie, and Kati teaching the older girls from the orphanage how to Zumba!

Tues video clip from Nica trip

2010-03-30T17:22:00.000-07:00

Nica Trip Tues updated

2010-03-30T16:36:00.000-07:00

Today we took the whole team and 80 of the kids from the orphanage for a day in the Miskito community of Betania. Betania is a village of about 600 people. The village was completely destroyed during Hurricane Felix in 2007. Under Pastor Earl Bowie's leadership we helped support them to rebuild over 90 homes for people of this community. On our recent trip in Jan, our team helped to start painting all the homes to help protect them and beautify them.

We played baseball, volleyball, soccer, basketball, and did crafts etc with the smaller children of the village.

Today was just about relationship building with the community and helping to further Verbo's outreach to this community. In addition is was great exposure for our team to the lives of the Miskito people in their native community.

Tonight we will have special time with the older kids at the orphanage. The women will be doing nails etc and teaching them Zumba! The guys will do manly stuff like physical competitions and mayhem.

Monday update from Nica Trip

2010-03-29T15:27:00.000-07:00

We started off this morning with a bible lesson in which the kids used props we brought and acted out the story. After the stories were finished we played some group games for fun. Duck Duck Goose seemed to be a favorite...anything involving running and laughing is a hit!

Pictured here is Chanoi. He is getting old! I remember him from four years ago when I first starting coming to Port. He now lives in the Discipleship house with the other boys 12 and older. It's a big deal to move to the "big boys" house :)

In the afternoon we took all of the kids (109) to the beach to play and swim in the beautiful warm Caribbean waters!

Marco lovvvvvved the ocean. I think he is part fish now!

Tomorrow we are heading to the Miskito Indian community of Betania. There were will engage in community outreach events along side of Verbo Church.

Everyone is doing great here. This team is awesome and is giving 110% to the kids!

Sunday trip update from Nica

2010-03-28T15:48:00.000-07:00

After church this morning the team had a special lunch prepared by Pastor's Earl's wife and her staff. We had shrimp skewers! With fresh shrimp from the Caribbean....nice.

This afternoon it was full-tilt fun time with the kids at the orphanage. There were crafts, coloring, uno, and some serious soccer time (I think we lost?).

The kids are so excited that the team is finally here and the fun has commenced. The kids are on vacation all week so we have plenty of time to engage.

In these pictures you can see the sky view of Puerto Cabezas and the final approach of landing at the airport. Every one seems to really enjoy the flight in the 12 passenger planes!

At the bottom is Karanda and her new friend Marjelly enjoying some classic arm wrestling. Also pictured is one of the craft tables.

Tonight we will here Jeff Allison share his testimony of how God called him to leave his career and come to Nicaragua to serve full time. Jeff's current role is the In-Country PEACE Coordinator for CFC. He is basically ground staff for CFC helping to manage our church to church partnership with Verbo.

Tomorrow our main event will be a trip with the kids to swim in the Caribbean. It's 85 and sunny here....hahahahahha!

Travel Day

2010-03-27T19:07:00.000-07:00

Not a whole lot to report on our travel day to Nicaragua. Our whole team is safely in Nicaragua. Eighteen of us are spending the night in Managua tonight and will fly first thing tomorrow morning to Puerto Cabezas to join the rest of the team.

Tomorrow morning we will be worshipping together at the Verbo church. In the afternoon we will play games and have fun with the kids at the orphanage.

Pictured left are Leigh Anne, my sister and my mom (taken in airport in El Salvador). It is my sister's and mom's first time going to Puerto Cabezas. They are looking forward to meeting all of the kids I have been telling them about for several years now!

See you tomorrow.

update from the airport!

2010-03-27T07:17:00.000-07:00

T-minus 8hrs til launch

2010-03-26T18:18:00.000-07:00

Who Changes Who?

2010-03-25T19:24:00.000-07:00

On Saturday almost 40 people and myself will head to Puerto Cabezas, Nicaragua. We are going to visit our church partner, Verbo, and specifically the orphanage there. Our team is "family friendly" and made up of men, women, and children as young as 7 years old.

I have discovered that a natural question that arises as people discuss this trip is: If you really want to support the orphanage, then why not just send the money you would spend on the trip?

Of course in the extreme cases I agree. But within reason I also am firmly convinced that there is great value in going. In John 1:14 we read that the Word (Jesus) of God became flesh and dwelt among us. The physical connection was important and God knew this. We of course do not equate ourselves with Jesus as we go, but I do believe that we should model what he did.

The stories are numerous and too lengthy to post here, but needless to say, there is real impact in the lives of our kids in the orphanage by the teams that are willing to go and love, hug, and engage with these kids. They are not interested in how much support is or is not raised. What they wait for, and hound the orphanage staff about, is when is the next group from ORPHANetwork coming?

In this picture is Bismark and myself. It's interesting to me to look into both our eyes. He needs me as much as I need him. Do you see it? That's what I love about our trips. Lives are changed and the Kingdom of God advances in Nicaragua and here at home...

But, what do I know?

Enemy or the Prize?

2010-03-09T08:46:00.000-08:00

On March 19 & 20 CFC is hosting the Jesus in the Qur'an conference.

Why?

After spending a total of 8 weeks in the middle east I learned that 2 Peter 3:9 was also meant for Muslims. It is not God's will that any should perish. We are not in a holy war in the sense that we have been told by the media. We are however in a holy war to "seek and save what was lost" (Luke 19:10).

What I learned during my time in the middle east is that just as Paul did in Acts 17, there are ways that we can speak to Muslims that are compelling to them within their culture. Sharing about the straight path into the Kingdom of God does not have to be about arguments, "holy wars", debates or politics.

These pictures are of people that my wife and I had the chance to talk about the Kingdom of God with....without starting any arguments!

During my experience there I even met a man who had formerly committed himself to a suicide bombing; but now he is studying the Qur'an and the Bible side by side to discover the true straight path. Every day he is taking small steps towards God's Kingdom.

What I hope to see from this conference is God breaking the hearts of our people for those who are lost.

Including Muslims.

They are the prize, not the enemy.

The enemy is the enemy...

But, what do I know?

food for Haiti

2010-02-26T14:17:00.000-08:00